Wednesday, April 1, 2009

On Days Like This

Dropping Teensy and her carpool buddies off at preschool is not always a pleasant task. The big girls are certainly ready for an afternoon of fun with Ms. Vanessa, but my little one wants to join in pretty badly.

Today, after finally separating my Kenna from her one-on-one time with Mr. Potato Head we started the short walk to the car. Immediately, she was distracted by all the daffodils and violas planted in the flower beds. She had to smell each one. I was patient for the first 30 bend-and-sniffs but then I was cold and wanted to get in the car.

She finally relented and came to the van to get buckled in. We were on our way. About half a mile down the road, it must had dawned on Mackenna that she had, in fact, not successfully smelled each flower before getting in the car.

She lost it.

She did her favorite new trick of unbuckling herself, causing me to pull of the road, unbuckle myself, put on the hazard lights, get out, open her door, re-buckle her and get ready to drive again.

I was not happy.

I told her that she is NOT to unbuckle her seat belt while I am driving and told her what consequence to expect if she did it again. She started screaming all manner of names at me and taking the tantrum to a new level. Then, after we had driven another mile, she unbuckled herself again.

When I was re-buckling her the second time she kicked me square in the jaw. I didn't talk to her after that. When we got home, she gave one final cry of "You stupid, dumb rat stink!" and refused to come in the house. She stayed outside screaming on the front steps.

Honestly, by that point I didn't care what the neighbors must think of the little girl wearing a bathrobe (she wanted to wear that instead of a jacket and I let her--because I really don't enjoy battling over every detail in the day) sitting alone outside. She cried and wailed out there while I was leafing through Teensy's book order flyer in the living room.

This part is actually a little cute: initially, she was crying for Maia. "Maiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" Sniff, sob. My Maia is so good with her and I thought it was adorable that Kenna wanted her big sister to be there for comfort her.

Back to the demonic part: Mackenna started crying out for me and walking into the house. I was done with the whole thing. I picked her up and carried her to her room where I removed her shoes and put her on her bed for her nap. I left the room, shut the door and held it closed so she couldn't come out--all the while not talking to her. Not trusting myself to talk to her, really.

Boy, was she mad. Then she got sad and was yelling things like, "I promise to not hurting your feelings again!" and "I'll do whatever you tell me!" And hand on heart, I think she believed herself.

But I sure didn't.

Of course, she fell asleep. I am feeling better just by having a little quiet time to myself.

Oh, and on days like this, I have a secret weapon to make me forget the tantrum completely:

How adorable was she at eleven months?

And if that doesn't work, I just have to look at this, from her very day of birth:

and I remember she really is an angel straight from heaven--even if I sometimes feel like raising her is #($*.


Deb said...

oh mendy. i'm just so glad that she napped. really. it probably saved both of you.

and maybe my day hasn't been so bad after all.

supersonicjan said...

hmmm, sounds like you need 50cc of Mr Rochester STAT! (call me if you need me to dispense it)

Amber said...

Maybe next time if she kicks your jaw hard enough, it will break. Then you can have it wired shut and lose all that weight you've been talking about. I see this as a win!

I'm so sorry for your day!

Jessica said...

Who knew such a temper lurked behind that cute face? Exactly where does she get it from, you or Michael? Tomorrow will be a better day!

Mary said...

I have to admit on days like that I sometimes head to my own room once things have calmed down and I have my own little cry.

Tracy said...

Oh, my gosh. I don't know how you hold it together. I'm the one that ends up yelling for all the neighbors to hear. I look at baby pictures too. It's nice to see how it used to be before they turn into these devil children.
Unbuckling the seat belt -- man, she knows how to get to you!
Hope tomorrow is better!

Anonymous said...

I am with Tracy, I usually end up yelling. I should just not open my mouth like you. I hope that she woke up from nap in a more loving mood and tomorrow is better.


Cami said...

Oh man, I've had that drive with Ethan. I started implementing the "car card" where they get stars on good car rides, and they could only watch TV or play computer if they had 3 stars. It sort of worked, sometimes.

Joni said...

I really lose it when my kids physically hurt me. I didn't know she had so much spunk (or whatever else you may want to call it:)!

Kellie said...

Hugs again to you. I hope the storm has passed today. I've probably said this before, but I try to think to myself that some really talented, successful person like George Washington or Elinor Roosevelt was just like this as a child. That spirit is what helped them be successful. Heaven knows they'll need spunk to survive this evil world. I also like the Mr. Rochester prescription from Janae. A little Mr. Darcy and the Guy from North and South will help, too.

Rachelle said...

Been there! Oh Yes it was yesterday when I let her scream herself to sleep while I enjoyed American Idol with my non daily temper tantrum kids. This age is so hard some days. I just can't believe that name calling. I probably would have lost it right there but I am obviously not as patient as you.

Good luck and keep those pictures handy. Their cuteness really is their saving grace some days.

Heidi said...

I've had those days. You handled things so well! I'm going to have to try keeping my mouth shut . . . and holding the door closed . . . and the baby videos and pics . . . and the 50cc of Mr. Rochester!

Good luck tomorrow.

Dawn said...

Awwww i saw her on the day she was born and she was an angel and she still is. \i think you make this all up, that darling child couldn't possably do all that LOL, rather you than me, wait till she's having 16 yr old tantrums, you'd better get steele armour for your jaw

Christie said...

Oh wow! The kick to the jaw would have sent me over the top. Good for you for keeping your cool. I tell you there are reasons why certain spirits go to certain homes, cuz, I don' t think I would have the strength that you do! Nicely done Mendy

amberacottrell said...

Mendy you are a good woman! Holy cow I can see Addy in there....what will come when she grows up??

Jann said...

You handled this so well. Great job on staying calm. I hope you are having a better day today.

Jenni said...

My goodness. I don't know quite what to say, but wow she's a fire cracker! You are such an awesome mommy Mendy! I second what Janae said and wish I could be there to share in the Mr Rochester dispensing!:) That video of Mackenna is precious!!

Anonymous said...

Ya manufacturers ought to invent some kind of childproof seat belt buckling thing!!! When I read your post, I definitely could relate!

nicole said...

I loved the part where you said not trusting yourself to talk to her...I have felt that way too many times.The reason being that when I do talk my voice quickly escalates to a yell. I really do believe that ignoring is a skill all its own...

Quotation of the Month

There is no way to be a perfect mother, and a million ways to be a good one.

-Jill Churchill